My God Moment

I love the morning time, well once my feet hit the floor I love the morning time!  I wake up super early on school mornings for 3 reasons. 

1- I hate being rushed! I do not function well in a hurry.  A rushed morning always turns into a day of chaos in my world.  I like to take my time getting ready and I do not like my morning routine being interrupted.
2- It is my quiet time of day.  All day I hear noise. During school is noisy, after school is noisy, and my nights are noisy (TV, phone, computer, etc.).  Noise does not bother me.  In fact, I do not like silence any other time of day.  There is something so peaceful about the mornings.  I can almost guarantee that my phone will not ring (other than my mom no one is up as early as I am), there is nothing interesting to watch on TV, and most of my neighbors have yet to start moving about.
3- I LOVE SEEING THE SUNRISE!! Every morning, I look forward to opening my curtains and blinds and looking at the beautiful sunrise.  There is so much excitement in that moment, so much promise.  In that moment, I can only imagine what my day holds.  I do not know what God has planned but I know he holds my day in his hands.

This past Thursday, upon opening my blinds, I experienced the sunrise in a way I never had before.  I woke up a few minutes earlier than normal, which meant I was ready earlier, and so I left for school a few minutes earlier.  Before leaving my apartment, I saw the sun barely peaking over the clouds as I put in an old CD I made the summer between my freshman and sophomore year in college.  While driving to work, I was able to watch the sun slowly rise.  If you have never watched a sunrise then you need to!

A lot of mornings, I find myself praying.  I pray for my day, my family, my friends, my students, my school, the list goes on and on.  However, this morning was different.  I found myself overwhelmed with the love of God.  I could not help but praise him.  While driving and taking in God's amazing creation, a song started to play.  A song that I have heard many times and sang many times.  Only this time, I began to reflect on what the words meant to me.  Take a few minutes to read the words and really let them sink in.

Carried to the Table
by Leeland

Wounded and forsaken
I was shattered by the fall
Broken and forgotten
Feeling lost and all alone
Summoned by the King
Into the Master’s courts
Lifted by the Savior
And cradled in His arms

I was carried to the table
Seated where I don’t belong
Carried to the table
Swept away by His love
And I don’t see my brokenness anymore
When I’m seated at the table of the Lord
I’m carried to the table
The table of the Lord

Fighting thoughts of fear
And wondering why He called my name
Am I good enough to share this cup
This world has left me lame
Even in my weakness
The Savior called my name
In His Holy presence
I’m healed and unashamed

You carried me, my God
You carried me

 

 

I was very fortunate to grow up in a loving home.  I was blessed beyond measure in so many ways (I still am!). But, like most people my life did not stay "perfect" forever.  My family went through many trials and many circumstances that I allowed to define me and my relationship with Christ.  I was a broken person and in many ways I still am (but, isn't everyone?).  There were many days that I felt alone and frustrated.  In those days, it would have been so easy for God to give up on me.  He didn't need me and still doesn't today.  BUT, HE WANTED ME! He loved me no matter how broken I felt, no matter how mad I was with him.  God carried me through so many painful days.  He never gave up on me.  God has taken those hurtful days and used them to bring to where I am in my life.

I am so unworthy of God's love.  I do not deserve his forgiveness.  But, because of his love for me, he healed me.  He sent his son for me.  God wants to use me and give me an amazing life.  I am so thankful that my God continues to reveal himself to me and continues to reassure me that no matter how broken I may feel, he will always be carrying me.

I am so humbled by God's grace and I am so thankful for those God moments when you feel his presence and reassurance all around you.  My God is amazing!!!!